"This, the first of his signs, Jesus did at Cana in Galilee, and manifested his glory. And his disciples believed in him." -John 2:11
A few months ago, I made a new friend who I met under the Studemont bridge one afternoon. She got my attention because the sign she was holding as she sat on the street corner read, "I am all out of options. Please help me."
I seriously considered drawing up a matching sign and just joining her on the curb. How different am I? Most days I am an emotional beggar, walking around with the exact same sign- the only difference is she has the courage to own up to her deficiencies. This woman taught me so many things!
Sometimes, owning up to our limits can be what really allows us to grow past them. When I think of big limits getting broken by God's infinite glory- I can't help but think of the Wedding at Cana. To be honest, I read this story as a kid in VBS but every time the build up to the miracle was somewhat lost because I already knew what was going to happen...Jesus was at a wedding with his mom and the disciples, the hosts of the wedding ran out of wine, and the party came to a screeching halt...then, Jesus fixed the problem and everybody put their party pants back on. It wasn't until I re-read the text last February at the Women of Faith conference that the weight of it really hit me.
There are countless significant parts of this story, but for me personally, I found my heart mostly affected by how the servants responded to Jesus. Jesus tells the servants to take,"Six stone water jars...each containing 20 or 30 gallons...and,'Fill the jars with water,'" (John 2:6-7). Well, lets do the math: if one gallon of water weighs about 8.34 pounds x 30 gallons x 6 stone water jars= he wanted them to go fetch about 1,500 pounds of water (not including the weight of the stone jars).
This was no small task, this was a JOB. Jesus asks them to go fetch the equivalent of a full grown steer in the middle of a short-lived party with cranky people waiting. The really humbling part of this story is that the servants didn't know how it would all play out, they didn't know what Jesus was going to do next. They followed his instructions with no hint that he was going to perform a miracle. They probably thought it was absolutely ridiculous to waste their time working so hard for no good reason. True, they would be blown away by his miracle, but they had no way of knowing what was in store while they carried out the mundane work of laying the groundwork. Jesus didn't need the servants to fill the jars, he controlled the level of oxygen of they were inhaling- he could have snapped his fingers and made wine instantly appear (He spoke the Earth into motion). I think Mary's words to the servants really sum up the basic lesson of the miracle, "Do whatever He tells you," (John 2:5).
I have never been more thankful than I am right this moment to know that I can always go to Him with my arms out and a big sign across my heart that says, "I am all out of options. Please help me." The logistics of returning to Kenya have required patience and great faith. Everything from fund-raising to security- although I am deficient, He has provided every step of the way. He has broken every barrier and performed such a mighty miracle!
Last year when I left Kenya, I felt like I was leaving part of my heart there. A part of my heart which I still felt phantom like connections to long after I departed. When I wasn't able to hold the children I loved in my arms anymore- I knew I was leaving them in the arms of their heavenly father- which was the safest place they could ever be. He has chosen to gift me with an opportunity to be his hands and feet again, an opportunity that feels like a glimpse of heaven. I am limited and empty, but I can rest with a confident heart that His infinite glory breaks through all borders.
Big miracles have been just pouring over in abundance (well beyond the brim of the jar of my heart) and the overflow is uncontrollable. One of these blessings was the full day of encouragement I received from my dear friends Ashley and Bryan. They gave me the honor of taking some pictures of them before they have their first baby- whose name will be Caleb!
(A +B=C...get it? They are too cute!) Ashley is such a huge role model for me and is one the women who has walked along side of me in faith for the longest. She is so wise and gifted beyond measure! It was pretty exciting when she married Bryan because he is such a strong servant leader and because he loves Ashley in a way every girl dreams that her friend will be loved by her husband. I cannot wait to see how God is glorified through their son Caleb. These two have served me in such an extraordinary way. I couldn't contain my appreciation for their support and love! Some of their pictures are at the bottom:)
I have never been more humbled or thankful for my incredible friends and family who have made this journey possible. I love you so much. I feel your love pouring out all over me and my heart is overwhelmed!
In His Love,
Mad
